more connection

In high school, I played volleyball. Not very well, however. I’m a pretty uncoordinated person in general, so adding a volleyball into the mix never worked out great. In particular, serving the volleyball was very difficult for me to figure out. When I started playing in seventh grade, I couldn’t get that ball over the net to save my life. It seemed I couldn’t find the right connection between my palm and the volleyball. It didn’t take long for my coach to figure out that I was only connecting on small portions of my hand, and that’s why the ball never had the power to soar over the net. She told me I needed to relax my hand, and focus on creating more connection between my palm and the volleyball. Eventually, I figured out how to serve the volleyball (somewhat) effectively. I figured out a way to create more connection.

Finding out how to create more connection with a volleyball is just one of many forms that connection can take. Connection can be a hug, a handshake, wifi, a coffee shop conversation, a text, a FaceTime, playing a board game, social media, writing, etc. I think some words from one of my favorite authors, Brené Brown, sum up all of these forms of connection and more, though. Brené Brown defines connection as,

“The energy that exists between people when they feel seen, heard, and valued; when they can give and receive without judgment; and when they derive sustenance and strength from the relationship.”

Every single one of us strives for more connection, whether it be with new or old relationships in our lives. These past few weeks, I’ve felt relationships in my life grow in unique ways. Typically, I’d text a friend to grab coffee, go to the movies, or go to dinner. With the lack of ability to do these things, I’ve felt how intentional we can be with our friends and family to create connection. In all honesty, this change of how we connect with others has been for the better in some ways. I have to be intentional with reaching out to others. Connection doesn’t happen at the movies, walking around town, or at a social event anymore. It happens by sharing stories, thoughts, heartache, frustrations, laughs, and motivation over the phone. Creating more connection is having real conversations about the stuff we care most about. It’s calling someone to talk with no distractions. It’s sitting down to write a detailed letter to a friend that lives far away. It’s directing all of our energy to help others feel valued.

Now, more than ever, is a time to create these strong and lasting connections. Thanks to the amazing connection of wifi, no distractions or excuses inhibit us from having genuine conversations with people. When we are able to have all of the activities back in our lives that are absent now, I hope that we continue to base all of our relationships on meaningful and purposeful conversations. These things build more connection than any fun activity ever could.

Make time for someone today to create more connection tomorrow.

There’s more to connection.

There’s more to it all.